“I am a doctor, and if you think I am going to help you, you must be crazy!”

I understand that, in our litiginous soceity, and the fact that you would be helping me to NOT go the doctor, it is really not in your best interest to help.

However, I am going to do this, so not helping me would be kinda mean, don’t you think.

I swear that I won’t try to sue or anything, in fact, I will be extremely grateful.